I'm incredibly busy today at work but I just needed to share this for the theraputic aspect (and that's a reason I started this blog).
Today when I was getting my kids in the car to take them to school a neighbor was walking her kids to their carpool in front of my house. So she stops me and says "Maybe you don't know this but Sam's Club sells large things of salt. You know because everyday I walk my kids by your house and they slip and slide and I can't let them walk in the street."
How do you respond to that? I was sooo annoyed-I was already having a difficult morning and then she has to be all passive-aggressive and make me feel bad. I know my sidewalk isn't cleared off (all the way) but we have tons of sidewalk (we live on a corner). I walk on it too. My kids haven't fallen or hurt themselves.
Why do we have to be so judgemental of everyone? Because that's how I felt! I fell like she is judging me because my sidewalk isn't as clear as hers. Sometimes you have to prioritize and my priorities might not be the same as someone else's. I understand that she thinks it is a safety issue but if she really thought it was dangerous she would put down her own salt or go a different way. I think when things are a nuisance we get annoyed and try to control them even when it's not our place. Maybe that's what she was trying to do.
But I felt she was offensive, plain and simple. And of course, I can't get it out of my mind.
I answered her "we've already gone through 2 bags of salt and I'll let my husband know." I don't know if that was the right way to handle it. I should have played dumb and asked her if she was offering to put down salt. Now I don't even want to.
Maybe the ice and snow could melt and I wouldn't have these problems!
8 comments:
1. we NEVER ice or shovel
2. I would have punched her in the freakin nose
3. does she work? if she has enough time to stop and give you mussar maybe she should just come do it her self.
4.I am so angry for you right now.
5. Can I punch her?
6. I bet you she doesn't have a nice slight used coat now does she?
You made me feel so much better!! And my coat is better than hers!
A normal considerate person who was genuinely concerned about their children (more than genuinely concerned about making someone else feel like crap) would have thrown salt over the neighbors walkway... and if they wanted to make a point in a positive way, would have said something like, " I see that you are very busy with your kids, I hope you don't mind, I took the liberty of sprinkling some of my salt on your walkway FOR YOU. Have a nice day." But she went about it negatively. It is similar to the difference between parenting with positive reinforcement "you ate it so nicely this time." vs. "stop eating like a slob." Why do I get the feeling she would use the latter phrase.
I also would have asked her if she was offering to sponsor your membership to Sam's Club. I hate passive-aggressiveness!!!
Ladies, ladies...aggressive is the word! Punching people? Ouch. What u do is follow her home and dump a full bag of salt in front of her doorway or better yet, go turn her hose on! Btw for that earlier comment, sorry for saying so but not shoveling ever, is for sure lazy and irresponsible.
E, you should have just said to her,when I get a chance I'll get to it, right now I have to go to work. (And maybe you'll never get to it.) And then forget it - she is a stay at home mom and your a working mom therefore you both have different issues to worry about. Mom
um, who is the annonymous commenter? Afraid I'll punch you if you insult me to my face?
Just kidding. And ofcourse we do shovel and ice occasionally. But my husband and I both work full time, as does Elisha and her husband. It's about priorities. And staying alive and sane and not running yourself into the ground goes higher then icing the sidewalk.
Besides, I was trying to go with the anger thing that Elisha had going on. :)
Ok, man of the house (lol) checking in on this outspoken comment thread. The sad fact is I'm a lazy SOB with a time-consuming job, and thank G-d, a large family to occupy my every waking second of life. Shoveling the six miles of sidewalk we are blessed to have living on a corner house in Chicago is simply not feasible sometimes. If I had a $60,000,000 budget for salt, I would gladly use it for the aformentioned miles of concrete for proper ice meltage. Hmmm... maybe now I can convince Wife-o-mine I can get an electric ATV with a plow attachment!??! That would be freakin' awwwwwesome! ...But then reality settles in and the neighbors will have to endure. Oh, the burden, the burden! Not all of us have snow-blowers be-otches!
-Husband OUT
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