I'm still here, are you?

Blogging is hard work. Unfortunately, all the other work in my life lately has been hard also, so of course blogging was put on the back burner. But I am still here and let me catch you up so far.

Working backward. . .

3 out of 4 of the kids have been sick lately, nothing major but just bad enough that they can't go to school. Which is ugh.

Husband had the stomach flu (food poisoning?) on Thursday which meant I was doing my stuff and his to take care of the kids. Made all of Shabbos before work on Friday (woke up at 5) and then went to work and had a full day. Whew, was I tired.

Have had crazy amounts of IEP's to write and am still not done. I truly dislike 8th grade IEP's, all the transition paperwork is such a pain to make up write. I also had a parent meeting with the principal, that's a whole post in itself. Just to sum it up, just because a student has a disability doesn't mean they can't be lazy! But it's always easier to blame the teacher. Like I said it's a whole other post which I really hope I get time to write soon!



I might have a future pro bowler for a daughter. We took the kids bowling on President's Day. It was the first time we took them (Big T went with school but it was the other girls first time ever). Little T kicked all our butts! And the ball was almost as big as her! And I know it's not a fluke because we recently aquired a Wii and the kids have been bowling and she is beating us all on the game too.

Funny story: At dinner one night Little T asked me to put "creases and wrinkles" in her hair. It took us a while to figure out she really meant curls. Sometimes she uses the funniest vocabulary. That, combined with her individualistic personality makes for some funny conversations (she also recently started calling me "momster").

All I've got time for now. Hope you haven't forgotten me!!

Pics, Pics, and more Pics

I am not a domestic person. My mom used to worry about me when I was younger that I would never be able to cook for myself much less anybody else. And forget about laundry. I just could never figure out how to do it (even with a cheat sheet hung up next to the machine).



But necessity is the mother of invention and all that. . . So now I cook and bake and have actually gotten pretty good at it. But I am not "Suzy Homemaker" and come home from a long day of work and make super exciting food because I enjoy it. I don't enjoy it. I do it. Because I have to. Or we would starve. And I would get arrested for neglecting my children.



But every once in a while comes an occasion that brings out my creativity. And so I present to you. . . my version of a rainbow cake (the cake is even made from scratch)!! Now I am NOT a perfectionist and do not want to be one. And I was not trying to copy anything else except for the colors. It is MY attempt at this type of cake and I am pretty proud that I pulled it off (thanks, honey for the help!!)

Here are 2 parts of the cake in the process of being put together. There were also yellow and blue but I got tired of taking pictures.

Here is the finished cake. It's for 2 of the girls because their birthdays are 3 days apart. So they have a combined party. I did the writing on the cake-I think I am getting better at it!

Side view of the cake.

And here is a cute pic of the baby I just took a few days ago. We are in the "up the stairs, down the stairs" stage. I just looooooove that face!!

Hopefully, I'll get a up a few more pics later. That's all for my creativity for now.

I can't believe it's been a year

Since Baby M was born.

Yesterday was her 1 year birthday. Seriously, where did the time go?

I've mentioned before that all my kids have strong personalities. M is no exception. She knows her own mind, what she likes and dislikes and has known that from a very early age. She likes to eat chicken, meat, avocados, carrots, yogurt, cream cheese sandwiches. She doesn't like baby food. She likes to sleep but doesn't like it when we put her in her crib. She likes to suck both thumbs, it doesn't matter which one as long as she has one.



She has never been a crier. Even when she was a newborn, she barely cried when she was hungry or dirty. When she did cry we knew something was wrong because she did it so infrequently. That's not to say she was a lump. She was very alert and met all milestones but just communicated with us in a much quieter, gentler way. In fact, there were times I would forget about her because she was such a good baby and I was busy with the other children. She has always been a great sleeper, the other girls are always up before I even her noises coming from her room. I say noises because she usually doesn't cry when she wakes up. She just lets us know she's awake.




As she has grown I have watched her communicate with pointing and making noises but she still does not cry very often (she does yell at dinner when she wants to eat-we can't get the food on her tray fast enough!). She watches her sisters and loves it when they play with her, even when they play rough. M is slow to get angry or annoyed with her siblings and often when she sees them her face breaks out into a huge smile and she holds her arms out to them to be held. When we try to give her something she doesn't want, she shakes her arm back and forth to let us know. She loves people!! All people, even strangers. She has no stranger anxiety and loves to be held by other people (of course I am choosy who I let hold her), she would go to anyone if she could. That's how friendly she is.




She looks so much like her sisters (so people say) but her face is changing-she is definitely becoming her own person. I always find it so interesting that even from the moment they are born, babies have their own personalities and temperament. I have seen that be true for all of my children. Their temperament has stayed with them as they have grown. As a parent, it has certainly been an eye-opening experience to learn how to parent each child according to their own temperament.



Baby M has a sweet and loving disposition. I hope I am able to nurture that so she becomes a sweet and loving child. She has truly added so much love to our family.

Our year in pictures:

You might be bored. . .

Not much has happened of late.

Kids going to school, schedule resumed.

Life is actually pretty calm. Which is really wonderful. And I do mean that. But doesn't give much in the way of blogging.

I'm a little stumped for topics.

I did start reading some new blogs last night (it's really addicting once you start) and I did realize something. Just an observation that I made. Many people have blogs that keep them somewhat anonymous. Most of their audience is made up of people who don't know them in real life (IRL). My case is the opposite. Most of the people that read my blog are people that I know. I haven't tried to promote this blog in any way or broaden my audience. Which is fine-I started this for me, not for any other reason. But, since most people know me I can't share everything I probably would if people didn't know who I was. I guess I am afraid of judgement and of being too personal. Sometimes I wish I could just say whatever I want. Although it seems the older I get, the more I do that anyway.

That's my deep thought of the week.

----------------------

Little T did say something funny a while ago. She asked me to buy a new house, one with a pool. I explained that houses are a lot of money ( I even told her "hundreds of thousands of dollars"). I asked her if she had that much money. She said no and then told me she had an idea.

Her words "If we all lost our teeth and put our money under our pillows, we could save up the money the tooth fairy gives us and buy a house that way." You can imagine my face, I was not expecting her to say that. My response "Honey, I don't think the tooth fairy has that kind of money AND not one in our family would have any teeth left!" (in fact I know the tooth fairy intimately and she is in debt-of course I didn't say the last part). Sometimes I just cannot keep a straight face with that kid! She just cracks me up!! I really do try not to laugh though, she gets angry at me when I think she is funny and she wasn't trying to be. Which is basically all the time.


Anyway, that's all I've got. Let's talk about the book on Sunday evening around 8ish? Oct. 25th? Hope that works for everyone.

I have the best husband ever!

Guess what my husband did yesterday. Maybe these pictures will help you figure it out.

He took the day off and took all 4 girls to the zoo. Bad weather and all. While I was at work. These 2 gorillas were sleeping curled up together holding each other. Aren't they cute? But not as cute as the cutie pie who was looking at the gorillas!

Anyway, I am super impressed with my husband for taking them out-it is hard work taking all 4 them anywhere by yourself. So I am publicly thanking him for his hard work!!

And the hard work just continues. . . with all the cooking that is being done for Yom Tov. Which he is doing most of. While watching 4 children. And working from home. Because you guessed it, I'm at work today. I will do the baking but he will do probably everything else. Whoever said men can't multi-task? Oh, wait that was me. Well, he has certainly learned how after 11 years of marriage.

So thanks honey, you are the BEST!

Back to school and some laughs

Getting back to school has been soooooo hard this year. Having kids in two schools, me going back to work, a fourth child to plan for; I'm not sure why it's been so hard.

The school supplies have been packed for weeks (I like school supplies, could be why I became a teacher??).

Uniforms bought and planned out for the year.

Afterschool programs planned out for the kids.

Lots of food/ diapers/ wipes /paper goods stocked up on so I don't have to run errands at this busy time of year.

And yet no matter how organized or prepared I am it seems that there is always some feeling of being overwhelmed and nervous about going back to routine and schedule. Don't get me wrong-the kids NEED to be in school and I like routine too. But I can't help but wonder how I will manage my life working full time and taking care of the kids and house too. I mean, the summer is hard enough. When fall comes I have to start adding another thing to think about-my students. ( Don't even get me started about the fact that they decided to do major construction in my classroom a week before school starts!! That equals no classroom for me AND I haven't set it up for the year yet! Which I guess is a good thing because it would all be ruined anyway.)

Then I start to think about all the holidays coming up and I am NOT prepared for that. Does Rosh Hashanah really have to be 3 weeks after school starts? That requires a whole other level of preparedness that I am just not ready to face. So I'll be in denial about that until I absolutely can't be in denial any more. I happen to like that coping strategy but I seem to be getting off topic.

Anyway, so many things to do and not enough time to do them all.


Might be why I am awake writing this post at 3 am.


But, I have been meaning to post 2 funny Little T stories that happened lately. That kid says the funniest things without trying to be funny and then gets mad when I laugh. Or retell the story. But sometimes I just can't help myself.

I did something really crazy last week and took all the kids to the doctor by myself. I know, I know it was stupid. But they all needed physicals before school and the thought of going to the doctor 3 separate times was enough to make my head spin. So I decided to grin and bear it. That visit could be a whole post by itself. But the reason I bring this up is because I tried to prepare Little T that she needed to behave while her other 2 sisters were being seen by the doctor (the baby just came along for the adventure). But Little T thought just they were going to have doctor appts. and she wasn't (I hadn't gotten to that part of preparing her yet). So she says(starting to cry) "But Mommy, I have problems too! I need to see the doctor too!" To which I responded "I know you have problems too, you are also seeing the doctor." She stopped crying and all was well. I think going to the doctor usually makes kids cry but we don't do usual around here!!


Yesterday when getting in the car the windshield was all foggy from all this crazy cold weather we've been having. So Lulu saw it and asked if it was spring outside. I told her no that spring comes before summer and now it's fall. Little T (in all seriousness) says "No it's not, nothing's fallen yet." We are quite literal around here. But then I started to think-she's right. What's with all this cold weather when the leaves haven't even started to change yet?

Oh well, it's too late at night to start pondering the mysteries of our wonderful/weird/annoying weather.

Here's to hoping everyone's back to school goes smoothly!!

next school year

So a few post ago I mentioned that something different is happening with the kids. It's pretty final so I wanted to share our decision and why we made it.

We have decided to change schools for Lulu and Little T. They will be attending a jewish montessori school instead of the super conservative jewish day school they had been attending. Big T will still be going to the same school.

Why the change? There are many reasons that we thought this would be best for our kids. I am not going to use this post to disparge the school they were at. That is not my goal. However, as a teacher I have high standards and expectations that were not being met for my children. It's not entirely the school's fault. The education system is broken in our country for a lot of reasons. And the jewish day school system is not exempt from those problems. In fact, the jewish school system is often behind the times and might even have MORE problems.

But ultimately my kids weren't getting what they need to be successful. For Little T, we are trying to be proactive because we do not want her to experience failure during kindergarten, when Lulu's issues started.

I do not want anyone reading this to think that we haven't taken responsibility for our children and their behavior. I KNOW my children aren't easy. That they aren't docile, "cookie cutter " children. They push boundaries. They like to get their way. But don't all children? Seriously, though I take them to appts. and am open to any and all things that will help them. That has been one of the hardest parts for me-the mom and the teacher-that there seems to be no accountability in the jewish school system. Even though we have been more than open and accomodating and done everything they asked to help our children, they have/will not. And it's no one person's fault. It's the limitations of the system that they are in and the lack of knowledge/experience with anything even a little bit outside their perception of the "norm." And that makes me sad. But rather than fight to change the system (which I originally wanted to do) I am not. Because I would rather use that energy to spend time with and enjoy my kids. (And because of the advice of someone within the system who know the ins and outs as a teacher and parent who said it wasn't worth it.)

I am excited for this fresh start for them. I truly think the montessori approach will utilize my children's strengths and build up their weaknesses. Every parent that sends their kids to this school has only wonderful things to say about it. The director is truly there for the kids, you see it in her face and in the excitement in her voice when she talks about the students and the program. There is also a more diverse student popluation which I am happy for my children to experience and be part of.

Hopefully, this will be a smooth transition and a new beginning.

What we've been watching

We were at the Library last week, and observed a milestone with Little M. The older girls were reading their book for the reading program, and Little M was playing on the mat. She started crawling across the floor to get at a toy and I was able to capture it with my blackberry!



Yay, crackberry! I mean, yay Little M!

Enjoy the video!

Blackberry Farm and Splash Country

On Sunday we took a trip to Blackberry Farm and Splash Country. In Aurora. About an hour away. We went with my sister and brother-in-law and their 2 kids.

Blackberry Farm is a pioneer village with museums, hands-on activities for the kids, a carousel, train ride, pony rides, farm animals, and a wagon ride. We spend about 3 hours there and the kids loved it. The kids watched a woodcarver (the husband tried to steal the tools :), they carded wool, they saw a toad in the pond, and they pretended to milk a cow (it wasn't a real cow and just water came out). Everyone really enjoyed the trip!!

A really old log cabin with some really young kids! Aren't they adorable?

Not the best shot of me but here I am am with 4 out of 6 of the kiddos. Little T absolutely refused to turn around. Did you know they had picnic tables in the 1800's? Just kidding!

I usually prefer not to put pics of myself but I included this for one reason-my 4 year old nephew took this shot! Can you believe it? I think he has a future as a photographer!

Now some shots of the pony rides:

The family on the train ride. The next one is of Baby M sitting on the train next to Daddy.

Splash Country is an adjacent water park to Blackberry Farm. You can get tickets for both parks for just $3 more a ticket. It was well worth it! The water park wasn't too big but it was perfect for the kids. It has water slides, a lazy river, a pool with 0 ft. depth. We stayed for 2 hours but the kids could have stayed until it closed!

Ok, so not a lot of pics from the water park. Baby M would not look up at the camera! Just notice the old school bathing suit-that suit has been around since I was a kid. No, I didn't wear it! But I did put it on my dolls and my mom gave it to my kids to put on their dolls. So when I couldn't find a suit for Baby M and was packing up stuff to go on this trip I saw it lying on the floor on a doll. Voila! It fit perfectly. And since it's from the 80's, she's right in style!

After the water park we went to a park called Jericho Park and had a BBQ. We brought everything with us-grill, food, ice, plasticware, chairs, bug spray, pretty much everything but the kitchen sink. Actually, that probably would have been helpful too. But too heavy.



Anyway, we had a great time. There is a lake there and the kids loooooved watching people fishing. My girls are certainly NOT squeamish-they told one fisherman when he asked if he should keep the fish he caught or throw it back-"keep it!" He was impressed. I think they would have eaten it right there on the spot if we had grilled it!



It was such a super pleasant day. Everyone behaved and had fun. What more can you ask for?



Ok, this post has taken forever (putting pics on takes such a loooong time-why?) Time to go make fish tacos for dinner and check to see that the kids haven't totally destroyed the house.

the clock in the sky

I know in previously written posts I have talked about Little T. I want to focus this post on her-my most stubborn, willful, independent child.


Little T is 5 years old. Sometimes she acts much younger and sometimes much older. I blame her behavior (read stubborn arguing) on her strawberry blond/almost red hair. She does have a fiery temperament and strong creative streak. She is extremely dramatic and loves to perform. But she also is my child who loves books and can sit and entertain herself for close to an hour reading books even though she can't read yet!


She is extremely picky about her clothes-she likes her socks pulled up all the way to her knees. She thinks turquoise matches red and pink. She made me paint the toenails on one foot pink and the other toenails on the other foot a different color.


She marches to the beat of her own drum. Actually, I don't think it's a drum it ,might be a keyboard. Or maybe a guitar.


Anyway, the reason this post came about was a conversation I had with her tonight while she was eating dinner and I was feeding the baby. Here goes:

Little T: "Mommy, Hashem had to work very hard to create the world."

Me: "Yes, that's true."

Little T: "He worked so hard then he needed a BIG, BIG rest."

Me: "Yep."

Little T: "Then he put a big clock/timer in the shemayim (sky) and that is how we know when holidays are."

(I have to admit that up until this point I hadn't really been paying attention. So I asked her to repeat-timer in the sky? What? So she told me again.)

Me: "Who told you this?"

Little T: "No one Mommy, I figured this out by myself. The clock tells when the holidays are so we know."

Me: "How did you get so smart?"

Little T (said in all seriousness): "Grandma."


You can imagine me laughing. I almost fell out of my chair. And then I had to call grandma right away and tell her. Now, I know who to blame give credit to! We had a good laugh together about Little T.


Thanks for being spunky and creative and your own person, Little T!! You certainly make life more interesting!

The T's have it and a REALLY good book

I have been meaning to post about 2 funny things the kids said and a really good book I finished about a week ago. So I thought I'll write about both in 1 post.

The first funny story:

My friend E wasn't feeling well a week ago. She lost her voice and sounded miserable. I told her 12x to go to the doctor-I thought she had a sinus infection. She thought she had bronchitis. She finally went to the doctor and guess what? She had a sinus infection (I shoulda been a doctor!) Anyway, I was reporting back to the husband when Big T says innocently "E has a science infection?" That was funny in and of itself but the funnier part it that E is a science teacher. We all got a big laugh.


The second funny story:

Little T was talking about being sick and told someone "I have the wine flu." No honey, that is what mommies and daddies get when they drink too much alcohol. You have the swine flu-not nearly as much fun. (No, I didn't really say that). I think I might need to get the wine flu after being cooped up in the house all week with sick kids.


Anyway. On to my good read.


It's called Shanghai Girls by Lisa See. You might have read some of her other books-Snow Flower and the Secret Fan or Peony in Love. Her newest book is about Shanghai during the 1930's leading into WWII and then immigrating to America during that time. It is about 2 sisters and their lives together and the choices they make to stick together to survive. Lisa See is a wonderful writer and I love learning about other cultures. She really makes the world of Shanghai come alive. A lot of the book takes place in LA during the time of the war and beyond. The persecution the Chinese felt from white people during that time was intense. Yet, without them much of America would not have changed for the better, they almost exclusively built the trans-continental railroad. Anyway, great book, I highly recommend it. She is a gifted writer.


I do have some other things going on involving the children but until they are set I will wait to divulge any more info. Trying to keep you guessing! Is it working?


Since I didn't sleep last night (and it wasn't because of the kids-I just couldn't stop thinking) I better go get some sleep.

Good Night!

School's out for summer

I won't lie to you-it's a little known secret that teachers look as forward to the end of the school year as much as the students do!  Okay, maybe that's not so secret.

Tomorrow is my last day of school and I can't wait.  As much as a I love my students, I have done all I can for them this year and now it's time for a break.  I even get one more week with just the baby before my own children are done with school.  

Then it's 6 weeks of camp and a family drive/trip to Maryland to visit my parents.  

Other really great things that have happened lately:

Little T graduated nursery school.  (I will try to post pics but they are on the husband's blackberry and I'm writing this at work).  She feels right at home on the stage and at one point she even sang when no else was and they were supposed to.  I guess that is one time that it pays to be LOUD!  She was sooooo cute!

Baby M is doing new things every day.  Her pincer grasp has developed with both hands so she can pick up cheerios and other foods with each hand and actually get it into her mouth.  She is also standing while holding on and can pull herself up holding on.  She can say "ma ma" and something that sounds like "a ba pa."

That's all for now-gotta go clean up my classroom!

Silly Shoes

Well, I seem to have taken a blogcation but it actually wasn't on purpose! I just didn't seem to have much to say.


But that never lasts long (just ask my husband).



Lots of things did happen this past week (listened to a Holocaust survivor speak, spoke with my children's teachers, finishing up the school year) but what I really want to write about is something involving my kids.



Two weeks ago I went to the Nordstrom half-yearly sale. I never go to that store unless they are having a sale because I love to shop and don't have the money you need to be able to buy stuff in that store. I did not take any children but picked out shoes for them and brought them home. Of course none of them fit (except the pair that I bought for myself) and I needed to return them.




On the return trip I made a BIG mistake and took 3 out of 4 of the kids with me. Bad, Bad Idea. One which I will never make again!! What was I thinking? I wasn't thinking I can tell you that. Because I walked out of the store with 3 pairs of Lelli Kelly shoes for almost $200! For those of you without daughters or small children these are THE shoes to have. Every girl's dream. Sequins and jewels galore.


I think you get the idea. But I do not ever spend that kind of money on my kid's shoes. (And two pairs were even on sale!) They grow out of them too fast and are too hard on their shoes for it too be worth it. But they begged and pleaded. And then they pulled out the card that tugs on my heartstrings: "All the other girls in my school have them."


Now, I know this isn't true. Those shoes are too much money for everyone to have them. But there are girls wearing them. And my girls want to be like them. And then I feel bad. Because I want my kids to have what others have even if that is superficial of me.


In the end, I held on to the shoes for a week without letting the girls wear them. And then I returned them. Partly because they were just too darn much money and partly because my kids were not behaving and they need to earn something that nice and expensive.


Then I went to Payless and bought 6 pairs of shoes for $60. And I feel much better.

Firsts

I'm sorry I haven't written for a while ( my sis got on my case) but for a while all I felt I could write about were complaints. And I don't want my blog to just be about complaints. Although it is my blog and I can write about whatever the heck I want even I was getting a little sick of myself!



So this is not a complaining post. It is about firsts. Pesach (Passover) started last week and it is M's first time celebrating the holiday. Of course, she has no idea what's going on-she's only 5 and a half months old, but still. She watched us during the Seder. She had some grape juice from my finger.



M also got her first tooth. We had absolutely no warning. Usually babies are fussy and uncooperative and you might even need to give them tylenol. Not this one. She has been drooling forever but that doesn't necessarily mean teeth are coming in the imminent future. Big T drooled for 9 months before she got her first tooth so I figured we had time. Well, I was wrong. At the second seder I put my finger in her mouth and felt sharp points on her bottom gum. I couldn't believe it and I might have to start to re-think this whole nursing thing. I don't like the idea of being bitten!




Another first: we gave M her first taste of food. She had applesauce and banana and even potato. Can you tell she's a 4th child? We didn't start with the baby cereal or test certain foods for a few days before starting a new one. I actually hadn't planned on giving her food at all until after Pesach but she seems sooooo ready to eat. She keeps grabbing cups and trying to put the food from my plate into her mouth.



Just today I gave some of my students their first taste of matza. They saw me eating it and were willing to have a try. Many of them have never met anyone Jewish and so all the traditions and customs that I keep are brand new and completely unfamiliar to them. Some of them liked the matza and some didn't but they asked me to bring more tomorrow so I take that as a good sign that I didn't scare them.



For the first time my husband and I cleaned our house for Pesach with no help. No cleaning help and no babysitting help. Usually I am scrambling around at the end needing something scrubbed or the kids taken away so that I can scrub something but not this year. We thought about our priorities and what we really needed during this holiday and that is all we focused on. We didn't clean anything extra (read: toys-just locked most of them up) and that helped. Also, being organized helped too!



Wishing everyone a Happy Pesach!

Tagged

I was tagged today by my lovely sister and as part of the game-playing process, I must find: 1 picture, 1 poem, 1 song, 1 quote, 1 item of clothing, 1 place and 1 disney princess. And then I must tag 6 more bloggers-in-crime. So here goes:

1. The picture(s) of my kids( I didn't have a pic of just one of all of them on the computer so you'll have to look at 3).
Here are the two oldest Big T and L enjoying posing for the camera.

Here is the baby M, the most laid back baby on the planet.

This is Little T, my red haired angel/devil.

2. A poem? This was a hard one but I chose to go down memory lane and pick a poem that I remembered from childhood. This is one of my favorite poems ever. In fact, anything by Shel Silverstein makes me smile.

3. I am really into Metallica right now. I would have to say that Hero of the Day is a fav. I never knew that their songs actually had such deep meaning.

4. Ok-I'm not sure if this a real quote but I have a poster saying it so someone said it sometime-"LISTEN and SILENT are spelled with the same letters." We don't listen enough!

5. Oh, I have a clothes problem-how can I choose just one item? Right now I would really like to wear sandals, flip flops or anything you can put on your feet in warm weather. I can't find a specific pair and the baby is crying so I'll leave you to imagine a pair.

6. The place? San Diego all the way! Lots of fun things to do, the greatest weather ever. Loooove it!

7. If I had to choose a Disney princess and I guess I have to or my sis might kill me, I would choose Sleeping Beauty. I can always use more sleep and she seems to have extra to go around. I also always liked her extra fairy helpers.

I will survive!

No, that song was not sung. But many other songs were sung, dances danced and acting acted.

I'll give you 3 guesses-where was I?

Ok, I'll just tell you, I went to Erev Shira last night. Sara has a great post about this (and hopefully the link works-I'm still a beginner). I couldn't not write all my thoughts about this evening of song (that's what erev shira means).

First, and foremost it is always wonderful to see kids perform-they work so hard and feel so proud. It is also amazing to see what the teachers are able to accomplish with kids of all varying talents, levels, and abilities. That being said I feel like I truly understand the meaning of the word sacrifice because I really and truly did not want to go! I kept trying to find excuses not to go; I have a cough, it's too late for the kids, etc. But my second grader begged me and begged me and I finally said yes. I wanted her to see her friends from school perform and I also wanted her to be able to talk about the performance with the other girls that went to see it. ( I am trying to be a better mom-but that's probably a post for another day). I also took L who is in first grade because I couldn't leave her out.

The message of the show was important and actually something that I would like to incorporate more into our family. Seeing the good in things that don't always appear that way. Making lemonade out of lemons. That sort of thing. I got it, but I'm not sure my girls did. Because after every scene they had at least 2 minutes of transition time when the stage was black and nothing was happening and then a loooooong song or dance. Could someone tell me why it has to be that way? My girls could not follow the story line with all the interruptions. And we were a terrible audience-everyone including adults talked all the time. What's up with that-aren't we trying to teach our children how to be respectful?

We didn't even stay the entire time, by 9:oo I just had to get my kids home and in bed. Especially considering L had lost all interest by that time and was waiting outside the auditorium because she was so bored. But that meant that Big T was upset because she wanted to stay until the end. There's just no pleasing more than one child at a time.

I would like to give a compliment to Big T. She gave lots of compliments to relatives of the girls who were performing. She was very sweet and she paid attention the whole time. Even L who had a hard time sitting didn't disrupt the performance.

So, I guess I could say it was $28 well spent. Time spent with my daughters watching something wholesome and relatively entertaining. Of course, this morning neither wanted to go to school because they were tiiiiiiiired (said in super whiny voices). Well, I wonder why?

P.S. The amount of balloons people brought to give to the performers could have carried me right up out of there-they filled the whole entryway. It's not Broadway people!

Appreciated and Appreciation

This past week was hard. One of those nothing ever goes right, can't get enough sleep, yelling at my kids, stress filled weeks. I just couldn't seem to handle stress and normal everyday problems that I normally can.


But there was a bright spot to the week.


On Wednesday, the kids had a carnival celebrating the upcoming holiday of Purim. It was super exciting for the kids and it is something they look forward to for many weeks. Well, Little T came home from school that day full of happiness and stories about the games she played and the prizes she won. As we were talking she mentioned that 3 kids in her class were absent because they were sick. She asked me very nicely if she could call them and wish them a Refuah Shelaimah (Feel Better Soon). I agreed and dialed the numbers for her.

The calls went a little something like this:


Little T: "Hello, this is Little T and I want to wish so-and-so a refuah shelaimah.


(Of course, I only heard her side of the conversations).


Little T: "What? No, Hello, this is Little T and I want to wish so-and-so a refuah shelaimah.


(I guess they didn't understand the first time).


Anyway, she had great phone manners and told her friends she missed them in school and she hoped she would see them the next day. She had to repeat that message a few times to her friends but they eventually got the point. I told her she did a big mitzva (nice thing) and I was very proud of her. Hours pass and we finish our night, Little T goes to bed.



About an hour after that the phone rings. And on the caller id is the name of one of the families that Little T called. It was the mom of the little boy that Little T called. She called to tell me how much she appreciated what Little T did. It meant a lot to her and her son and she felt like she needed to tell me. Not only she did speak highly of my daughter regarding the phone call but she also shared with me times she had been in Little T's classroom and she saw how special Little T was. This mom told me she felt that Little T is so caring and generous and truly cares about her friends. She said Little T is spunky and independent and her goodness shines through.



Whoa, are we talking about my child?

I said thank you, hung up the phone, turned to my husband and almost burst into tears. Because no one has ever done that before. I have the kind of kids that everyone notices and not always for reasons that are good. My kids aren't bad, they aren't mean (except to each other), but they are high maintenance and full of energy. Oh, and they are smart and perceptive so you can't trick/manipulate them easily.

But that phone call really made me think. And I realized a few things.

1. In today's society we are so concerned with boundaries (and often we should be). I am especially conscious of not wanting to overstep that sometimes I forget that sometimes overstepping is the right thing and might make someone feel good. That phone call couldn't have come at a better time. It was wonderful to see my daughter through someone else's eyes.

2. I need to stop labeling my children. I often talk about my kids and label them or give them a role in the family. Little T is the stubborn one, Big T hoards toys, L is the nurturer. All of these labels are true but they aren't the only ways to define my children. I need to remember to talk about my children in a more positive manner. I forgot that Little T is a giving, caring child that makes friends easily. What a strength! Hopefully one that will follow her throughout life.

A little appreciation goes a long way in this world where we don't often stop to say a simple "thanks." So I am saying thanks to this mom for seeing the good in my child. Thanks for taking the time to tell me. And most of all, thanks for reminding me how wonderful my kids are.

A little tongue stretching

Usually when my kids say cute, funny, or silly things I have a habit of forgetting them if I don't repeat them to another person right away. I have forgotten many cute expressions because of my faulty memory. But I did have 2 conversations with Big T that I do remember and I thought they were pretty hilarious.

Both these conversations took place during carpool in the morning on the way to school. I had just finished taking the baby inside the babysitter's house. When I got back into the car our conversation went a little something like this:

Big T: Mommy, I am sorry.

Me: Sorry for what?

Big T: Sorry for sticking my tongue out at you.

Me: When did you do this?

Big T: Just now when you were getting back in the car. You didn't see me?

Me: No, I didn't see you. Why did you stick your tongue out at me?

Big T: (after a moment's hesitation) Weeeeell, I was just stretching it.

It took all I had in me not to laugh out loud at this excuse. I guess I need to give her points for creativity!

The second conversation happened immediately after.

Big T: Mommy, can I run for President?

Me: President of what?

Big T: Of the country, of course.

Me: Of course you can but you have to be much older to be President.

(Then we proceeded to do the math to figure out how many years it would take until she was 35).

Me: Why do you want to be President?

Big T: Because then I can BOSS people around!

Well, there's her personality in a nutshell!

I guess I'm an idealist

Firstly, I would like to say Happy Birthday to my wonderful husband. I won't get all sappy or anything because I hate when people do that kind of stuff in public but I will say that I can't believe we have shared 10 years together. In a way, we have really grown up together( we got married when we were 20 and 21) and I feel so lucky and blessed to have you by my side. Happy Happy Birthday and Many, Many More!!



Okay, now for the real topic of this post. Yesterday, we had a meeting with L's school about her behavior in the classroom. Just to give a little background, she has been having difficulty following directions, she has been having tantrums, she has been leaving the classroom, I could go on but you get the idea. She is 6 years old and in 1st grade.



We have done numerous interventions outside of school to help her. She sees an OT, we have put tube in her ears 3x (she is prone to ear infections), taken her to a chiropractor (because of ear infections), started her with a social worker, gotten her a full psych/academic eval, are taking her to a neurologist because she has sleep issues (we think). I think that might be it, but I could be forgetting something. Anyway, the point is we are NOT in denial.



The meeting actually went fine and I think the school is impressed with all the steps we have taken. The point of this post is not talk about the meeting but rather my some feelings I was left with after it was over.



We spent a whole chunk of time talking about how L doesn't like to join the group on the floor when they sit on the floor to listen to a story. We discussed why that might be, how the school/teacher could address it, etc. But I was left feeling-why the heck is this important? Don't get me wrong, I am a teacher and understand full well how classrooms work. I know that I want my child to be taught how to behave appropriately and to learn how to be safe and take responsibility for herself. Where does something like sitting on the floor fall into that? Why does every child have to do the same thing at the same time all the time?



It seems to me that in the educational world of today, we stifle all aspects of a child's individuality. I don't know why, I do know it is easier to teach that way. But it make me sad. I have children that don't fit the mold. They stand out. A lot of the reasons they stand out make them difficult to manage. But I have this feeling that all of these "difficulties" will help them be successful adults when they grow up. They speak their minds. They think for themselves and have opinions. They have lots of energy. Why would I want to squash these parts of their personalities just to have them be like everyone else?



Yesterday's meeting helped me realize that even though my child has "issues" I am proud of her! I am learning to appreciate all aspects of my children even if the rest of the world doesn't.

The most stubborn child I have ever met

Those of you who know me and my family immediately know who I am talking about. However, if you have not had the pleasure of meeting us in person and you read this blog (not sure if there are any of you out there, but just in case) I will give you a little background info.

I have 4 daughters. The oldest, big T just turned 8 years old and is in second grade. She is full of energy all the time and has ears in the back of her head (she hears everything especially what you don't want her to hear). L, the second daughter is 6 and a half. She is the nurturer, she loves to help, but has some sensory issues and difficulty in school. She is all about fairness and fixing wrongs into rights. She is in first grade. The baby, M, is 3 months old and the calmest, most laid back baby ever. I hope she continues with this personality until well, ever.

Little T is 5. She is in nursery school, she is adorably cute but she is the most stubborn child I have ever met. That is saying a lot. I don't know if you remember but I have only had jobs working with children. Not just any children-most of them special needs children. And I have never met another child as stubborn and stuck in her ways as my 5 year old daughter. This character trait comes out in all sorts of ways but the hardest for me is getting her dressed. She only likes to wear certain clothes (over and over, which I could live with) but she can't wear summer clothes when it is -5 degrees outside. And we have had days like that this winter. I know these days parenting advice is all for talking to your children. Process it with them, explain it to them, blah, blah, blah. Then if things really don't work send them to time out. For most kids I think this could be the best strategy. However, I don't have those kids, I have kids that need to experience to understand.

Let me give you an example. Last week, little T would not get dressed in the morning. After she finally put her dress on she refused to put on tights. (This goes back long way-she has never liked things on her legs but we haven't argued about it lately). I kept trying to tell her why she needs to wear them, it's cold outside, your feet/legs will be cold, and on and on. It didn't matter, she was not putting on tights. After going around and around with her during the most stressful part of the day-before carpool, getting to work, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I opened the front door, took her arm and made her stand on the front step with nothing on her legs and feet. I kept her there for 2 minutes (it felt like forever) while I did something in the kitchen - she was in my line of sight the whole time of course. She was crying and crying but I didn't break. When I brought her back inside I asked her if she understood why Mommy wants her to wear tights. She said yes and went to get her tights. No more arguments about tights (yet)!

This situation just made me think that there isn't one size fits all parenting. Am I a bad mom for trying to teach my children even if they need a different way to learn it? Instead of worrying why my kids need that different way, isn't my job to ensure that they are safe and learn to take care of themselves and the world around them?